Saturday, September 11, 2010

transparent

 So, I was about to post this update:
Yes, we are still waiting for our Ohio background clearance to come through. This is a ridiculous amount of time to wait for a background check. Other states process their clearance within 10 days, yet here we are in week 11, waiting... I can't figure out why we're having to wait this long.
Is God trying to teach us patience? Is the Enemy trying to thwart our plans?
Guess I just needed to vent.
This wasn't supposed to be one of things that we were planning on having to wait on... you know?
God is continually reminding me that He is in control, even in this small details... I'm just having a hard time letting it go:)
It'd be so much easier if I knew going into it that it was going to be a 3 month, 4 month etc. wait. But instead, we are having to tread through the water without any idea where, or if there is any land. I know, I know... If I really trust in Jesus like I say I do, then I need to start acting like it.
This is not easy.
Here is where the distinction lies. In saying you're a Christian, a follower of Jesus. Completely trusting in Him... I mean really trusting in Him, not allowing that attitude of control get in the way of what He's trying to teach, and the opposite, which is what I've been trying to stop doing the last few weeks... you know, get frustrated, think of a million scenarios ("if it comes this week then that means..." or "what if it doesn't come for another 2 months?") basically not really believing that The God of the Universe can handle this. sigh.
I'm thankful that The Lord loves me in spite of the million times that I say that I'm "letting go" then turn around 5 minutes later, only to have totally snatched it back up again. double sigh.
Let me be very clear in saying that I ONLY want to be in God's will. I don't want to be out from under His protection.
Most of the time though, I'm pretty sure that MY way is the right way. I'm also pretty confident that I'm perfectly wrong in thinking that.
I know that I can't see the bigger picture... and He can. I know that I can rest in the assurance that He loves us and wants what is best for us. Jeremiah 29: 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
Please pray for us. For the peace that only He can give to wash over us. Pray for His perfect timing. Pray for His favor to be on us.
...Yet before I had time to post it, I got an email from our social worker that said this:
Katie,
Hold the presses.  I just received and email from Barbara and she states she will do the searches I requested and have the results to me around 9-14. 
Praise the Lord.
Wow! God's faithfulness floors me yet again. I am humbled, eager and super pumped! Please keep praying for us as we walk this journey.



3 comments:

  1. Hang in there! We too experienced many hangups and frustrations...our homestudy alone took 6 months to receive, it took them 3 months to get our 4 visits in and 3 months to write it, several families who began the process 2 months after us are already home with their children!!! BUT we received our referral a couple of days ago and already I can't imagine HER not being with us, she was chosen, hand picked by God to be our daughter and if our homstudy agency had been as "efficient" as I would have liked, well who knows....anyway, keep praying and we will continue to lift you up as we regularly pray for all families, Phil. 4:6-7 is a verse I recite often!
    Blessing,
    Codie Floate

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  2. I get this. I so so get this. We're waiting on ONE piece of paper for our dossier. ONE. Everything else has been done for two months. Patience. I just keep telling myself that this is all for the purpose of God choosing our daughter in His perfect timing.

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  3. i completely understand your post. trusting god is so much harder than just saying it and just because we "know" that we are called to it doesn't make it any easier. i'm not going to tell you anything you don't already know but i will pray :)

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